Being able to resolve a conflict in a mature way without any hard feeling is everything. Here is what conflict can do for your relationship.
1. Build deep knowledge and intimacy
Disagreeing will teach both of you more about you what you like (and particularly what you don’t like).
It will tell you what is important to each person, how you raise or react to problems, how you approach to compromise and negotiation, and what helps you feel better.
Arguing makes you grow. It forces you to understand yourself and your partner better.
2. Create teamwork by solving the problem together
If you can “argue constructively” and “fight well”, you will dig into the concerns underneath the argument. Strike a balance when both of you are arguing and if it ends without physical injuries, you’re good!
3. It strengthens your relationship by increasing trust
Constructive fighting that allows you both to express your thoughts, preferences, and negative emotions, can strengthen a relationship.
Coming out the other side of an argument can build trust in the relationship.
Knowing the relationship can survive fighting makes fighting less threatening.
And finding fighting less threatening means we tend to raise concerns earlier rather than allowing tension to build up.
4. It helps you understand and explore “small issues” before they become “big issues”
That advice of “don’t sweat the small stuff” doesn’t really help if it just means that all the small stuff is piling up into one, big, volcano primed for explosion.
Addressing small issues that rub you both the wrong way can prevent a lot of resentment and hurt feelings down the track.
If you don’t address small issues when they arise, they often evolve into bigger issues that are really hard to unpack.