Being in a relationship in Kenya is like being in a matatu, wengine wakiingia, wengine wanatoka.
We often joke on how men hurt when a woman ‘eats’ their fare but there are things that hurt more.
Here is a list…
1- Telling a woman you love her and she says, ‘OK’
Ghai! That must hurt, even to ladies this scenario does hurt. A good one.
Guys, if a lady tells you hakutaki on several occasions just count your loses and move on.
Otherwise utapata depression na heartbreak bure.
2-Kunyimwa cookie jar when on a sleepover
Ladies, let no man lie ati ‘ooh nothing will happen just come tuchill’.
In most instances, that man has already calculated all the kamasutra styles he will perform with you once you go for that sleepover.
3– ‘Babe nanyesha’
This phrase hurts more than a heart attack. Imagine washing the house, preparing a three course meal for your babe only for her to say ‘nanyesha’.
Many men won’t agree but they have silently wished they could throw us out in such instances.
4- Sitaweza Kuja
Now that I am all grown, I realize how much I might hurt some of my exes by using this line on them.
Imagine a boychild scrubbing the house, changing the sheets, sending you fare only for you to cancel…oouuuch!
5- You are not my type
We all know that mwanaume ni kujiamini, no man ever wants to think of themselves as inferior.
It might be true that man might not be your type, but it still hurts to hear it being told straight to your face.
6- Being belittled between the sheets
No one, and I mean, no one likes to have their family jewels belittled.
Nothing hurts a man more than being told his manhood belongs to the ‘Kanini kega’ Sacco.
That hurts more than a lady ‘eating’ fare.
7- Kupatana na dame unaswim ndani
Imagine being denied her cookie jar for so long only for you to ‘drown’ ukipewa.
That can kill even the strongest of men.
Ladies tufanye kegels tafadhali, mtaro tuwachie Nairobi river.